IT'S SNOW GOOD

For a country that snows every winter, we don't half go on about. I usually find out it's snowing via my Facebook feed, despite having at least two windows in my house. Why bother lifting your head to peer out the window when there's a mobile phone in your hand?

Then the TV news bulletins come. Newsflash: 'SNOW!!! PANIC!!!' accompanied by a roving reporter stood at a gritting depot. The next day, the newspapers start printing photos of various places covered in snow, just in case you've still yet to notice it's snowing.

If you think the usual media coverage of the white stuff is tedious, lets see what spin Yahoo News have decided to put on it:


Stars tell of battle with snow 

Celebrities including singer Toyah Willcox and hip hop duo Rizzle Kicks posted a series of tweets detailing their battle through snow-covered roads. 

Toyah revealed on Twitter how she was marooned on roads in Sussex for 14 hours, and finally got off the M23 at 6.30am. Toyah and Brighton-based musicians Rizzle Kicks were among hundreds of people stuck in traffic as heavy snowfall descended on the South East. 

Toyah, 54, tweeted: "Literally 15 miles from Brighton. SNOW SNOW SNOW." Two hours later, she added: "Still stuck in snow and traffic at hayward's heath. Trying to make brighton for act 2. Been in car 4 & half hours :-(." 

Her misery continued as she later tweeted: "Huge apology 2 brighton and cast. I'm 11 miles away still. A23 south is a car park. Its been 5 hours now. Mortified! :-(." Another two hours later, and with little movement, she wrote: "Still on A23, not moved yet northbound is moving freely. 6 hours! Come on snow isn't that bad :-o" 

At around 10am this morning, a clearly exhausted Toyah tweeted: "Got off M23 at 6.30am. 14 hours in all! Talk about being mighty miffed!!!!!! Xxx." 

For Rizzle Kicks, consisting of Jordan Stephens and Harley Alexander-Sule, the weather also played havoc with their plans last night. They tweeted: "Complete gridlock on the motorway. This is going to be a fun evening." Later, they added: "It has been an extremely long night. But we're almost home." 

They summed up their feelings in a follow-up, saying: "Snow is a d***head." 


ZZZZZ...

ZZZZZZZ...

ZZZZZZZZZZ...

Oops sorry. Hearing about Toyah Wilcox tweeting in realtime about her experience was soooo enthralling, I actually passed out in excitement and started shouting: "TELL ME MORE, TOYAH!" whilst still comatose.

Yes, Rizzle Kicks, snow is indeed a 'dickhead'. One person who'll be screaming "I hear ya, bro!" is Oxfordshire Council's leader, who was so pissed off by the unexpected arrival of snow that he actually threatened to sue the Met Office.

Coming next week: COUNCIL TO SUE CLOUDS FOR OBSTRUCTING SUN, and COUNCIL CRITICISES RIVERS FOR ALLOWING PRECIPITATION.